I struggle so bad with trust...which makes no sense, really, as I know the truths that the Lord is in control. That He knows the number of my days, and even more so that He lovingly sent His son to this world to live a perfect, blameless life and died a horrific death, that those who believe in Him would be made new in a right relationship with God through Jesus' sacrifice. So why, like a child, do I forsake the truths I know so dearly for the crippling reality of fear? The only answer I have is sin...that is my sin that I struggle dearly with. I'm so thankful that despite my sin, it's already paid for and the Lord is using my struggles to teach me and show me how to trust more and more every day...here's what has been going on in my life the last few days...
Wednesday evening was a little scary, but I had no idea how scary Thursday morning would be. I started noticing some wheezing in my breathing when I would lay down starting on Monday evening. I then developed a dry cough...and from there it transitioned into feeling short of breath as of Wednesday evening. Ryan and I decided we would try to get me into the OB Thursday morning. When I called the emergency line to hopefully get in to see the doctor, he calmly urged me to go to the er to be checked out, just to be safe.
There we found out following a chest xray that there was quite a bit of fluid retention in my chest, around my lungs and even a little around my heart...I thought, maybe pneumonia. A CT scan followed my xray to check for a blood clot, that really started to scare me. We quickly praised the Lord when it came back negative...no blood clot. Next we were informed that I would undergo an ultrasound of my heart, to check for any problems there...Praise the Lord, again...we got the all clear! The cardiologist even exclaimed, "She has a beautiful heart." Then came the next heartbreaking news, I'd be admitted for observance and given diuretics to flush out the excess fluids and try to rule out the possibility of pneumonia. As you can imagine, by this point I was a wreck; crying, high blood pressure. I was so scared of being left there all alone over night, while my husband and 5 day old son returned home without me. Imagine our delight when we found out that the hospital I was in, doesn't believe in separating loved ones if they don't have to. What a blessing to have Ryan & Jonathan by my side as labs continually were drawn and bathroom trips were very frequent thanks to the diuretics.
Throughout the course of my 24+ hour stay I dropped more than 10 pounds in water weight...with still quite a ways still to go to get all of this extra fluid out! I was released yesterday afternoon with more water pills to do once a day at a home. It's nice to not feel so swollen, I guess I didn't realize how uncomfortable I was until I lost it! Thank you Lord, for providing a minimal health set back that could have been so much worse! Thank you for providing even the comforts of having my husband and son in the hospital by my side. Thank you for the love of friends and family who surround us and continue to help Ryan & I during our adjustment into parenthood.
No comments:
Post a Comment