Smiles, tears and a cheer...

Wow, these past few months, 2 to be exact have been nothing short of AMAZING! I went sprinting back to Christ. I moved to a different church. I got involved with a small group. I became an Auntie again. I watched my nephew gracefully step into his terrific twos. I made a decision to move schools. I chose a new path for my life. I got back to pursuing my Veteran benefits. I was blessed with being in the waiting room and one of the very first to find out that I had a niece. I was even more blessed when I got her first (non-gas related) smile! :-D

I shed some tears today. I went for my first dr. appointment at the veterans affairs office. I met with whom I'll call Dr. V (which is what I call him anyway since I can't pronounce his name.) Wow, what a blessing he is as my primary care physician. For once it felt like a doctor wasn't trying to rush me out of the office. He sat and took all of his time to really get a feel for what my needs were. He listened to me when I requested no more medications. He offered a supplement to help me with my sleep, and even agreed with me that my sleep patterns are cause for concern. Thank the Lord above that my symptoms don't point to Sleep Apnea. How scary that would be! He honored my request for the weight management classes, and was very sensitive to my weight and more importantly my self-esteem. You see, today I found out that I've not only reached a point in my life that I swore I never would, I actually kinda jumped a lil beyond it. I am so ashamed of myself. But thats not what I want to dwell on. After the appointment, I was in the car, it was all I could do not to cry in regards to my personal failure. I didn't know where to turn to get the honest yet uplifting words that I knew I so desperatly needed. And then God pressed on my heart the short but oh so meaningful conversation my sister-in-law and I had had yesterday. So I called her and asked for her help. Can I just say how amazing she is? Or I'm sure she wouldn't be upset at me to say how amazing our God is that has made her the amazing God fearing and loving woman that she is. She acknowledged the fact that I let myself down, but then she was quick to point out that it doesn't mean that God loves me less. Yes, He wants me to be healthy. But then Kandy said something I will never, ever, ever forget. She told me she would rather me be the size I am and at the spiritual point I am at than to be back down to skinny mini and apart from God as I was. I couldn't agree more with her. I'll gladly keep all of these pounds on that I do not like if it means I will remain in love with and walking along side my Lord and Savior.

So, for now, I'm remaining single and putting my sights and concentrations on 4 vital F's...FAITH, Family, Friends, & Fitness...wish me luck...pray for me...please ask me how I'm doing...call/text/email/IM...help me keep me in check!