No matter what....blessed be the name of the Lord!

PSALM 113

Praise the Lord!

Praise, O servants of the Lord,

praise the name of the Lord!

Blessed be the name of the Lord

from this time forth and forevermore!

From the rising of the sun to its setting,

the name of the Lord is to be praised!

The Lord is high above all nations,

and his glory above the heavens!

Who is like the Lord our God,

who is seated on high,

who looks far down

on the heavens and the earth?

He raises the poor from the dust

and lifts the needy from the ash heap,

to make them sit with princes,

with the princes of his people.

He gives the barren woman a home,

making her the joyous mother of children.

Praise the Lord!

I found it soo fitting this week that I read this passage as the responsive reading at worship this morning. I volunteered before I had read it. What a blessing it was to my life reading through it before worship and rehearsing it at home. I still find it such a comfort. I'm surrounded by death lately. By mourning. By grief. Its hard. I don't have the answers. And I have so many questions. But I'm comforted that regardless of the situation, I have someone who knows all the answers...who knows all I can take. Even when I feel like giving up, and boy do I ever. I had to shut off my emotions regarding 9/11 because I feel like I can't take anymore...and just when I thought I'd made it through the day my mom comes home crying, she's lost a friend in a tragic motorcycle accident. LORD BE WITH ALL THAT MOURN.  "Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." Matt 5:4 Comfort us Jesus...pick us up and move us forward...regardless Lord, your name is worthy to be praised and I will praise the name of the Lord forevermore. 

Self-Care vs. Self-Destruct

Father God,

WHY!!! Was she in pain? Was it quick? Did she cry out to you? Did she know it was coming? WHY??? That sweet little girl, she'll be so confused and grown up wayyyy too young. Its going to rob her of her childhood...and probably mess with her adolescence. WHY??? That sweet newborn boy will only have a very few pictures of the precious 10 days she had with him. WHY GOD??? WHYYYYYYYYYY? I don't get it. What will happen to this family that is destroyed? Will there be women to stand up and teach the children of her? Will we get to watch them grow up? Where does he go from here? Will they all stay together?

So many thoughts race through my mind as I think about this beautiful woman, 26 years of age, taken just 6 years after her daughter's birth and 10 DAYS after her son's birth. And yet, I can't even talk out loud about it without losing it. Those poor precious children had their mom riped from them so young. And her man, bless his heart...I can't even comprehend his pain. I do what I know best, the only thing I can do right now....never ending prayers cried out on their behalf. I have a Father, who hears them. Who is sovereign. Who knows everything I need and supplies it. Who is holding this young family in the palm of His hand up against His heart. He after all, hand crafted each and every one of these people I'm crying out about. He knows them all by name and what will happen. I find peace and hope in that. So tonight, I cry out for them...and for me. I'd rather start crying out for me and others when I'm broken than continue on the path of self-destruction. That's what happens when I don't care for myself and only for others...I self-destruct...and in that I hurt the ones I love. I don't want that. I want to love them, because I don't know when my Maker will call me or them home. But to love them the right way, I must first love me and the only way I can love me is if I'm in right relationship with my God & King.

---Thank you Kandy for being there tonight to talk with me and remind me of that...God knew I needed you. Thank you for allowing him to use you as an instrument to get through to me.---

Dear Addison

Last night was your first slumber party with me, though it wasn't planned, it was still fun! You see, there was a fire near your home, and so we brought you down to Mamaw's house to sleep for safety. You are only 2, and you were so sweet climbing up into my bed you were quite excited to be sleeping in Meme's bed. Zeke jumped up into the bed and you were even more excited that Zeke wanted to sleep by you! I covered you up and you snuggled in next to my pillow. The next thing I knew, you had left your pillow and were putting your head on the corner of mine. You put your forehead up against mine and you fell asleep. You were so sweet lying there next to me. I prayed over you as you slept. I thanked God for you, my miracle niece. You are my proof how Sovereign our great God is. You see, when your mom was pregnant with you she went through a great deal of stress. And yet, God in His mercy, chose to save you, for you to be born. And here you are. Beautiful and vibrant and full of life and personality. You amaze me every time I lay eyes on you Addison, for the simple fact that God hand knit you together. I love you sweetheart.

Love always,
Aunt Meme

Sin

Once there was a snowflake, a teeny tiny snowflake...and it fell from the sky onto the top of a hill, and then another fell and another and another, until they formed a ball. And that ball grew in size with each snowflake that fell. And then the ball became so big that it started to roll down the hill, but this wasn't just any hill it was a HUGE slippery hill. And as the snowflakes continued to fall onto this ball, the ball continued to grow in size. It raced down the hill growing bigger and bigger. And then one day it stopped right on top of a girl. And she was buried, lost under all of those teeny tiny snowflakes that together formed the biggest snow ball. She was trapped inside that snow ball and couldn't find her way out.

One day, the girl, she saw a hand reaching into the midst of that snow ball. The only hand that could pull her out of the intricate web of lies she found her self trapped inside of. She knew her Savior had come for her, had come to show her that she was worth saving, that she didn't have to trapped inside that snow ball, that she could walk in beauty and newness of life.That he had given his life that she might have hers with him in eternity With the love of her Savior holding her she stepped out of the snow ball and began life again, leaving all those little lies behind her, keeping her eyes fixed on her Savior and all he had done for her and the children he loved.

Jesus, Thank you that even though I stumble and fall into lies, that you send people who love me to help me remember I'm no longer stuck inside the snow ball. That I am found in YOU, that I'm made new and I can walk in your glorious light knowing how deeply loved and valuable I am. I love you Lord, help me to remember this when I lose sight of just how precious I am to YOU.

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!

ONE-DERLAND IS A BEAUTIFUL PLACE TO BE!!

Its been over 2 years since I left, and as of this morning, I've returned. I'm re-energized to keep moving forward. How exciting!! I thought this clip was only fitting to help remind me its about moving forward!!

Stationery card

Pictures In Noir New Year's Card

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Stationery card

Pictures In Noir New Year's Card

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